Saturday 28th December - I've bought a coat!

Mir, one of the Tall Ships

Some how, slowly, by degrees over the past seven years, my heavy-duty proof against all precipitation coat and I have reached almost exactly the same circumference.

I blame the steroids. Others might blame excessive chocolate consumption over time.

Whatever the reason, this became the season when something had to happen in order to improve my chances of surviving a British Spring (being made of sugar and spice and all things nice, I am peculiarly susceptible to damp) The near replacement to my trust all-weather mac is on sale - but do I require medium, or do I need to embrace the new reality and go for L?

So, a trip to Chichester was required, in order to try on the coat before I* fork out a Substantial Sum of Money. The proof was self-evident - L is it. I reckon if I get seven years of warmth and dryness then the money is well spent.My old coat has plenty of wear left in it - a trip through the washing machine, and a short spell in the dryer should see it washed and re-proofed ready for daughter. Along with the super duper duvet-style zip-in-and-out liner which I have loved dearly and worn frequently on its own as a casual jacket.

Oh, and I was extremely gratified to find I weigh a whole kilo less today than I did before Christmas; and this without exercising extreme restraint around chocolates and Christmas feasting. Still not enough less to reconsider the purchase of the coat!

*Himself it was who handed over the credit card. I did say I would repay him when my ship came in...

Friday 27th December - Another Day Full of Incidents

'But what of Christmas?' I hear you say! It is still Christmas, and will be for another week. It's been Christmas like it always is...

Yesterday, however, yesterday, was something else. It was going to be just an ordinary day - some errands to run, and then probably sitting around, doing whatever we wanted.

That was before the bulb in the sitting room ceiling light gave up the previous evening. Attempting to replace the bulb revealed that the bulb holder is bakelite, and probably dates from 1953 when these houses were built. That makes it 66 years old, which explains why it shattered into chunks of plastic.

So, while the tyre that was punctured at the beginning of the week was being replaced at 8am, Himself was able to wander round to the nearby DIY store and buy a new bulb holder. Then, when he returned, he could replace the bulb holder and bulb, and also the dimmer light switch which dates back to about 1985 and won't work with modern bulbs.

But... the fluorescent tube in the kitchen also stopped working in the morning. We had a spare tube, but that wouldn't fire up when fitted - ah - the holder contraption (also about 20 years old) had breathed its last.

Back to the DIY store to buy a new spot-light style ceiling fitting and wire it all up.

What a good thing that Himself managed to get on a Job Creation scheme and train as an electrician and as a plumber all those ears ago when we were first married.

Did I mention plumbing?

Everything was cleared away and I had just set out a very late lunch, when the doorbell rang.

It was our nextdoor neighbour; the drains, linking our houses were blocked. Himself and Number One Son abandoned their sandwiches, gloved up, and set to work, lifting the manhole cover and doing the usual flushing and proddling and poking about until everything was functioning as it ought.

Oh well. Friday 27th December is a normal working day, for those who haven't booked it as holiday or aren't teachers, so, (ab)normal working is what happened! 

Monday 23rd December - A day full of incident

But first, and maybe last, the O Antiphon of the Day - listen, and relax

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U21la_YEJbY

O Emmanuel, our King and lawgiver, for whom the nations wait, their Saviour: come to save us, Lord, our God.

Now, those incidents;

I am mulling over in my mind what to do about refreshments after my godmother's funeral in the New Year. It is possible that there may be only a scant dozen present; me, Himself, my father, maybe her cousin, her next-door neighbours, their neighbours, and possibly one of the delightful team who came in every day during the last ten days of my godmother's life. So that's nine. In a chapel that holds up to one hundred. They had better not all sit in the back row!

So, about these refreshments - I know that the neighbours won't stay, they said so, and now we are down to a possible seven. All I want is somewhere that will let us sit in a quiet corner of a lounge and serve tea, coffee, and a slice of cake. Maybe a sandwich.

I do not want to book a full buffet for a minimum of 20 people!

Still, I have another couple of days to sort things out.

We drove to that neck of the woods today, through a lovely bright morning, admiring the shimmering effect of the sun on the flooded fields on either side of the rivers... found the crematorium, looked at one nearby venue (closed), tried to find another, and then our attention was caught by a strange noise coming from the car tyres. At this stage we were on a busy dual carriageway, so kept going until we reached the first venue - a pub called the Golden Retriever. Now open! This meant that I could wait in the warm, by an open fire, while Himself and the AA solved the flat tyre problem - fitting the space-saver spare.

I'd have chosen the Gold Retriever for the funeral refreshments then and there, but for two things - 'we are usually open by half past ten' - hmm, usually is not good enough - and 'no, we don't serve cake'.

By this time we were pretty well finished, so drove to my godmother's house, picked up a few things that we need, and then to a nearby restaurant/hotel for lunch. He had a steak - it had been that kind of day. This place would be pretty well perfect, but they don't serve cake either. Just restaurant and bistro food.

After a good meal we just came home, for coffee and - not cake, mincemeat surprise scone from yesterday, warmed with butter. He's organised a new tyre for Friday, and I've informed one set of relatives 'I doubt we'll be able to come - Mum and Dad are very frail now; even getting to the shops is a huge effort for them' and the other is not answering the phone tonight.

Supper was easy - I made vegetable soup, and have set aside two portions for the freezer. If we don't have them later, I'll have soup to take to work next term.

There's a fair bit of tinselling to do yet - it might happen, or it might not.

I keep getting distracted by other things... knitting.... doodling

Sunday 22nd December - Advent 4 - mainly about food

To my surprise, I managed to get to church this morning. At ten to nine I changed my mind from 'sit and knit' to 'get up and go' and arrived in verse three of the first hymn (and I was not the last!)

That made an excellent start to the day. Himself stayed at home. going through the last eighteen months of my Godmother's bank statements to identify all the payments. Intense work, prbably made a lot easier by me being out of the house.

We had an early lunch of dill herrings ( we had two jars at the back of our fridge, bought for my godmother, who at one stage appeared to be living on rice-krispies, swedish dill herrings, gluten-free crispbreads, potatatos, apple puree and rice pudding - but not all at the same time). She'd gone off the herrings, so I kept them for ourselves and we ate one jar of them today, with non-gluten-free crispbreads, home-made coleslaw and salad. And very good too.

How early? Half past eleven, because of trekking to the next town to collect this turkey that I ordered a couple of weeks ago, not knowing that Waitrose and M and S would have their shelves SOLID with turkeys yesterday. As it happened, this was one of the slickest 'collect-the-turkey' exercises ever, and we were home again within a remarkably short time.

I spent the afternoon stocktaking in the kitchen. All the housekeeping has ground to a halt since Easter, when life became so complicated and full of alarms. The cupboards and freezer drawers no longer had any semblance of order and method and had just succumbed to madness.

Suffice it to say that the worms in the compost bin have never had it so good, assuming they enjoy a bountiful feast of out-of date cans and jars, well-past-their-best-before baking good and vegetables, and stuff out of the freezer. I have a list of jars and cans and packets approaching their end of life to use up, all stacked in order on the shelves, and a shopping list of replacement goods. Yes, I KNOW custard powder lasts for ever, but even 'for ever' comes to an end sometime.

Well, it is half past seven, and we have done what we wanted to for today. I've cooked a batch of sausage supper

and will put the spare portions in the freezer, and also a tray of  mincemeat surprise from my friend Laurie's blog.  The scone mixture is flavoured with mixed spice and orange zest, which is why there is a bald orange sitting beside the remaining 'surprises'.

They should have been allowed to cool, and then iced and garnished with dried cranberries, but I'm not sure they are going to last that long.

   

Sunday 22nd December - #Pause in Advent 4

https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Milky_Way_and_Sagittarius.JPG

The last of the four journeys - and it's.... Jesus! His was the longest journey - maybe not in miles - after all he was carried by Mary all the way! But in time...?

Here goes;

I'm sure I wasn't the only child who found this statement in the Nicene Creed completely incomprehensible;

For us and for our salvation he came down from heaven,was incarnate from the Holy Spirit and the Virgin Maryand was made man.

 Back then, the only words I knew with any kind of similarity to 'incarnate' were the flowers and yum yum yum, Carnation milk!

Later, when I was a student, I discovered chilli-con-carne, and chille-sin-carne, and the penny dropped; carne meant meat! (Why did it take me so long? I knew about carnivores and herbivornes, but never made the connection.)

Incarnate; embodied in human form. I suppose I could have looked it up...

Then, suddenly, this took on a whole new meaning

The Creation of the World

 In the beginning, God created the heavens and the earth. 

The earth was without form and void, and darkness was 

over the face of the deep. And the Spirit of God was 

hovering over the face of the waters.

 And God said, “Let there be light,” and there was light.          And God saw that the light was good. 

They are, God, Spirit and Word, right at the beginning. All together.

So, Jesus had the longest journey, not in miles, but in time, and in space, the universe and everything.

And, unlike everyone else's, his journey is never-ending.
   
There you go - that's my four-pennorth for Advent. I now have to go and sort out the crib scene - they have been carousing on a corner of the bookshelf together since last Christmas;

At least Mary is still holding on to the baby. How did Father Christmas get there?

Saturday 21st December - O Oriens

On the shortest day, this is the O antiphon

O come, thou dayspring, come and cheer thy people by thine advent here Dispel the gloomy clouds of night and death's dark shadow put to flight.

Today the gloomy clouds came and went, interspersing heavy rain - and it was heavy, too, landing like a series of heavy blows on my shoulders as I took the peelings out to the compost bin - with clear skies and cold winter brightness.

We did The Big Christmas Grocery Shopping Trip today. The shelves were absolutely full of turkeys of every size and style and price at about half past eight in the morning, which was incredibly annoying, as we have reserved our turkey and half paid for it, and now have to go and collect it tomorrow afternoon when we could have been - for example - not going out and collecting it. Next year....

The deal was that I would take over cooking from today.

So far, so good;

We had sausage rolls and a little salad of grated carrot, lettuce and pickles for lunch, some chilli prawns as 'a little smackerel of something' at tea time,

"Nearly eleven o'clock," said Pooh happily. "You're just in time for a little smackerel of something."

and then cheesy baked potatoes and a lamb and vegetable stewish kind of thing for supper. The lamb stewish thing assembled itself gradually. I started by sweating some onion and garlic, thinking I would mix that into the baked potato with some cheese, and then cooked some frozen peas with a half carrot that was cluttering up the bottom of the fridge. It wasn't looking too promising, so I added half a tin of tomatoes - still not looking wonderful.

Then I remembered that we had retrieved all the portions of pureed slow-cooked lamb we had made for my godmother and delivered to her freezer - so added that to the vegetable-soupish mixture, turning it into a rather good stewish mixture. Good to know I haven't lost the skills accumulated over thirty-something years.

The remaining portions of lamb, some in chunks, some finely chopped, some pureed, will be combined with the portions of pureed potato also in the freezer to make cottage pie at some stage between now and New Year. I'm looking forward to it - and if you are coming round here for a meal in that period you had better be looking forward to it too!

Friday 20th December - Growing up - and O Clavis David

actually, I'm pretty good at folding fitted sheets these days, even king-sized double sheets  - so long as the process works first time. Otherwise I might just tantrum. I teeny bit.

I've been a grownup for quite a lot of today, filling in forms to do with my Godmother's affairs, phoning solicitors for advice, discussing bank accounts, and even completing nearly all of my tax return when it is nowhere near 31st January!

A lot of chocolate is needed to keep going. Fortunately we have a whole big box of Marks and Spencer chocolate truffles which I had bought to take round as part of my contribution to a Book Club Meal, but left at home,turning up with just a couple of falafels and a dish of marinaded tomatoes. So that has left us with plenty of chocolate to add to the daily Advent calendar ration.

Not ALL the wrappers are mine...  

I feel as though I have too many time-critical projects to complete and need to keep track of. I think this is roughly the order of importance now;

Christmas Food Shopping - deadline - in time to cook Christmas Dinner

Christmas Present Wrapping - deadline - in time to open them on Christmas Day

Funeral arrangements - we've set the date for early next year, but before then we need to arrange where to go for eatables afterwards, draft an order of service and choose photographs for said order of service. Actually, I've just sent the draft and photographs off by email. 

We've also got to arrange payment, part in advance, part afterwards, which relies on telling her bank as this is the only thing they are prepared to release any funds for ...see below.... 

Probate forms - deadline - sooner rather than later - this means completing a great wadge of pages of questions to answer, and copies of important documents to gather. We'll take it all down to the registry office, rather than entrust original documents to the Mail at this time of year. 

 

Bank Accounts - set up an account, fill it up with money, and then switch all the standing orders for payments regarding my Godmother's property, BEFORE informing her bank which has told us they will freeze her account once we tell them.

Tell my Godmother's bank about her decease - deadline - sooner rather than later - but after we think we have redirected all the payments.

And then, on my own account,

My Tax Return - deadline - complete and pay before Jan 31st - at the moment I am locked out of the payroll system at work so can't get some of the details before next week

Send out invoices and accompanying emails to pupils - deadline - 4th January or thereabouts 

This invoicing lark is always good for some confusion - from years of experience I know I am certain to attach the wrong invoice, or forget to attach an invoice, or send out a whole batch with typos and incorrect dates - I blame my artistic temperament (one 'super-spiritual' churchy friend informed me that he thought I had a Gift for administration - at that point he lost most of his credibility in my eyes)

Today's Antiphon

Latin: O Clavis David, et sceptrum domus Israel; qui aperis, et nemo claudit; claudis, et nemo aperit: veni, et educ vinctum de domo carceris, sedentem in tenebris, et umbra mortis. English Translation: O Key of David and sceptre of the House of Israel; you open and no one can shut; you shut and no one can open: Come and lead the prisoners from the prison house, those who dwell in darkness and the shadow of death.

Wednesday and Thursday 18th and 9th December

Here are the O antiphons for yesterday and today

or you can listen here for the 18th and here for the 19th

We spent yesterday, 18th December, following the Law, as it concerned the death of my Godmother; collecting paperwork from the hospital first thing n the morning, so that we could then go to the funeral directors to start arranging the funeral, go on to her house to check for mail and messages and collect photographs to use at the funeral, and then to formally register the death in order to acquire certificates and an all-important 'green paper' to authorise the cremation.

In the course of all this we ate most of a packet of chocolate Minstrels and half a roll of peppermints (as well as lunch in a one-of-a-kind gluten-free very very healthy-eating cafe which produced an excellent frittata and an interesting three bean chilli and sausage patty - not our usual fare, but surprisingly satisfactory at the time)

It was a long day.

Today was more paperwork and more telephone calls. Oh, and I haven't forgotten it is Christmas - there were the last couple of dozen cards to write! More chocolate has been consumed in the process (purely medicinal, of course).

I've been going through the couple of tins of photographs to choose some for the order of service. Back then, photographs were an expensive, rationed record; the tins are full of snapshots barely two inches square. I have found some wonderful and amusing pictures of my god-mother as a baby, back in the 1920s which have made the whole day worth while.

Going through this process feels like a new stage of becoming an adult - perhaps I'm just a late developer!

Tuesday 17th December - O Sapienta

The first of the 'O Antiphons' leading up to Christmas Day will be sung tonight; O Sapienta

you can read more of this tradition at the ibenedictines blog here

O Sapientia, quæ ex ore Altissimi prodiisti, attingens a fine usque ad finem, fortiter suaviterque disponens omnia: veni ad docendum nos viam prudentiæ.
O Wisdom, you come forth from the mouth of the Most High. You fill the universe and hold all things together in a strong yet gentle manner: come to teach us the way of prudence.

Now I feel Christmas is really on the way!

I've made a to-do list for today;

Hoover the WHOLE house
Hang up the washing
Write at least 20 Christmas Cards
Wrap the presents that have already arrived
Tidy the table (after writing cards and wrapping presents
Book various appointments for registering my God-mother's death
Phone my father to sort out delivering Father Christmas and the Fox 

It's going - fairly well. I've hung up the washing, had lunch, blogged, read the poem from the 'In the Bleak Midwinter' Advent book that the Fox is standing on, opened my Advent Calendar windows and consumed the contents, and melted up some suet and stale crackers to make bird feeder thingies - not sure how successful they will be.
 
So I can tick them all off the list - oh, hang on a moment, I will need to write them all on the list first...

I think I need to apply some 'strong and gentle wisdom' and manage the rest of the day with a little more prudence!

Sunday 15th December - Pause in Advent #3

The third journey that came to mind this Advent was that of the Magi, Wise Men, Kings of Orient.

Now the shepherds had exact instructions, and a short run down from the hills.

Mary had a nine month's journey, from the arrival of the Angel Gabriel, and including a 90 trek across inhospitable country

The Kings? How far did they travel? I've done a brief scoot through the internet and been offered Persia and Yemen as possible origins.

Using Google maps;

From Aden, on the southern tip of Yemen, to Bethlehem 825 hours on foot, about 1,790 miles

From Teheran, in Iran (which used to be Persia ) is 401 hours on foot, about 1,240 miles.

What a journey! Even if they managed 20 miles per day, they would have had to stop frequently to rest and recover.

And the instructions? 'Leave everything, and follow the Star for an indefinite length of time, for an indefinite distance'.

How far would I follow something, or someone, without a clear idea of what I was seeking, or where I had to go, or how long the journey would take?

How long a journey am I prepared to contemplate? How sure do I need to be, before I start packing my case?

How detailed a map, or set of instructions do I need before I leave my house, close the door and set off?

And what about the dangers along the way?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-HrfbV16-FQ

 

Sunday 15th December - What we did today

So this is the family blog post; the others are 'Pause in Advent' and 'Advent Book Club' still to emerge from my subconscious...

Today - church in the morning. It's always nice when we go together and sit together - we managed the former but not the latter, as the organist for the day arrived distinctly under the weather and too unwell to play. I took one look at her and suggested I stand in - or rather sit in. 'What hymns have you chosen?' - she was too flurried to remember and no-one else knew anyway.

With the help of a nearby member of the congregation I chose;

Praise my Soul the King of Heaven - because I know it
O come, O come, Emmanuel - because I like it, and haven't had a chance to sing it yet this Advent
It Came Upon a Midnight Clear - because it is my absolute favourite and I would have it every Sunday if I were in charge.

I also made the discovery that my glasses work perfectly for reading and playing if I wear them upside-down, like that snooker player. However, they wouldn't stay on, so I turned them back the right way up, pushed them close up against my eyes and peered hopefully at the music. I found I could read most of the notes and make quite sensible guesses at the others this way. at least I now know what to ask for when I go back to the opticians.   

Next, we met Son and Daughter for lunch at a place which is conveniently located for them and for us. We arrived an hour and a half early! Plenty of time for a toasted tea cake, coffee, and quiet relaxing morning.

I tried my hand at drawing people;

 
Imroving, I'd say. I don't think any of these faces are recognisable - portrait artists have nothing to fear from me!

Then it occurred to me it would be useful to spend the time writing Christmas cards. The shop had no boxes of cards for sale - just individual art cards for £3 each. Brainwave! I bought a sketchbook, and started making my own cards.

Quick suggestion of a Christmas tree on half a page, and write the message on the reverse (this took a bit of thinking through). I used up about half the book before the others arrives and we had lunch.

It was a lovely afternoon - bright winter sun slanting across the green fields, sheep dotted around the pasture, and the bare branches of the trees etched against the clear blue sky.

Once home, I finished off the cards using inktense pencils and water;

and wrote the envelopes. Oh. Forgot to photograph a tree after applying the water. They are all stuck in envelopes now. It's going to be tricky to complete my-Christmas card list; the printed list is in alphabetical order by surname, but I was using the contacts list on my phone, which sorts them by Christian name. However, I have now got another 20 cards randomly selected from the printed list ready to be posted.

I had a tricky phone call this evening - we've left a message on my god-mother's phone directing people to call our number for news, and tonight the first of her relatives called. My God-mother wouldn't tell anyone she was ill - her thoughtfulness has back-fired rather, because her death is now coming as a complete and unpleasant surprise to her friends and relatives, who are all now in their eighties and nineties. Tomorrow's task will be to go through her address book and send letters to anyone who looks likely to be friend or family. It's alright for us - we saw it coming, and the circumstances leading up to it so death has come as a mercy, not as a shock. But I do feel very sorry for people like tonight's caller.

Right. On to the next post - Pause in Advent #3 - Journeys - the Magi

Saturday 14th December - It's all gone quiet

Today I have.....

Taught eight children at the Music Centre - mostly carols, but a scale or arpeggio found its way into several lessons, a sneaky bit of sight reading ('I bet you a biscuit you can manage Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer') and even keyboard harmony; working out chords and improvising a tune. So I think that qualified as proper teaching.

Home; knitted some rows of the 'mindless wrap'  project I'm using 600 yards of aran, or worsted weight yarn, and 5mm needles; cast on 5 stitches, knit three rows, then, evey row is slip 1, knit 1, yfwd, knit to end of row.
What seems to happen is that the rows increase in length by one stitch every time (that's the yarn forward) and a series of eyelets appear at each side (also because of the yarn forward).
Stop before you run out of yarn and bind off loosely. I'm hoping to create a whole row of eyelets along the top two rows before casting off, by doing a row of slip 1, k1, [k2tog yfwd] until last 2 stitches, k2. Then I'll knit  2 more rows and cast off  That's going to need a few sums, and weighings of how much yarn it takes to knit a whole row to work put when the end is nigh. Somewhere around 300 stitches per row, by that time. This pattern is sort of based on one I saw elsewhere. The good thing is that I only need to concentrate at the beginning of each row

I have also done a massive tidy up of heaps of stuff lying everywhere, filled the recycling tub in the kitchen with no-longer-required paper including endless copies of easi-play Jingles Bells and Away in a Manger and even Put Things Away. In cupboards, not mangers.

So I feel entitled to sit with a tea tray and relax.

I fear I am becoming like my mother; she warned me that would happen. I find like a tray cloth on my tray these days. I hit upon the idea of cutting a leftover scrap of fleece to fit - perfect; it's non-slip, heat proof, dries in an instant and goes through the washing machine. 

Next on the list will have to be Christmas Cards. I have written and posted 2. Two. Once I have finished blogging, I will switch on the music - I brought back the magnificent Music Player  from my god-mother's house on Thursday, and have filled the USB stick with Christmas music - and see if I can get a couple more written.

Himself has done an amazing job getting the Christmas Lights strung round the sitting room. 

You might just be able to make out the knitted Christmas trees on parade along the mantelpiece. 

I hear sizzling - he's cooking supper...

Friday 13th December - Peace? Maybe....

It is only quarter to three in the afternoon, so it is a bit too soon to get into a totally relaxed state after the turbulence of the last couple of months.

I refuse to even consider what the election results will mean. Sufficient unto the day is the sorrow therein. I reckon it is a just retribution for all the mockery we heaped upon our neighbours over the pond after their election results a few years back. We should have held our tongues - look who's laughing now. (Not I)

I've also stayed off twitter and facebook, and kept the TV switched off. I'm wounded already, no need to add salt.

So now for something completely different;

 There now. Isn't that pretty? It is this year's Jacquie Lawson calendar, and I have made snowflakes and decorated wreaths and iced biscuits and and made jigsaw puzzles and completed word searches and played 'hunt the sheep'. How lovely. All to the accompaniment of gentle happy Christmas music.

And breathe.

Only eight more lessons left to teach, tomorrow morning, and one drumming worksjop to lead, this evening.

Last night I prepared a batch of Delia Smith's mincemeat. It is an excellent recipe; you mix everything up, and then, the next day (as in this morning) cook it very gently for three hours, so that all the fat melts. Now I have to remember to stir it every so often as it cools, so that every ingredient gets coated evenly in the suet (proper beef suet in this household), before packing it into jars. It seems to keep from one year to the next, and beyond, without spoiling or drying out. 

Thursday 12th December - what a day

Oh. My. Word.



I suppose today 'started' yesterday - with a crisis with my Godmother. She wanted a doctor to come and see her as she was getting very breathless, and her legs were swelling. The surgery sent a paramedic, who was desperate to admit my godmother to hospital as there were sufficient symptoms to make this an urgent necessity. Well, it took the combined urging of the paramedic, myself, and Best Beloved to overcome her reluctance, but eventually, off she went. I rang an hour or so later, and she had been given a bed in the A and E and that's all they could tell me at that stage. I rang again after 10pm, and there was no further news - she was still in A and E. We went to bed (and slept very ell, knowing she was in safe hands.)

When the phone rang at 7am this morning, I kind of had a premonition of what had happened - the doctor was clearly more than a little careful when he told me that she had died in the night, being given every possible care to make her comfortable. She had given strict instructions that we were NOT to be contacted until the morning - that we should be allowed to have a peaceful night. That is SO like her. She had obviously made a great impression on the staff!

I'm so glad that we persuaded her to go in - I couldn't bear the thought of her becoming even more ill while alone at home, with no help, not palliative care to ease her, which the paramedic said was a real possibility.

We went to the hospital to collect her belongings, and then to her house to check lights and so on, lower the heating from tropical to temperate, and clear the fridge, tidy the kitchen, find her papers etc. We can't do much more until the coroner has finished doing his/her stuff; as death occurred so soon after being admitted there has to be some kind of scrutiny and discussion of the cause of death before the certificate can be issued.

I'm sad at her passing - but glad that she went before the cancer had made her life a real misery, and after such a short illness. It really was just a couple of days of being bothered by the breathing difficulty and the legs, as far as I know (she wasn't very good at being totally straight with us) and I think she was so pleased to be back in her own home, with the carers coming in every day to keep and eye and help her with this and that. On the whole I think she was the winner in this, managing to escape what would could have been a very difficult future. 

Home again, or rather, to the local polling station. If we had gone straight home we would never have been able to make ourselves go out into the horrible weather.

Phone calls to close family, to the various people like the carers, the podiatrist, the cleaner, all due to come in over the next few days.

Supper.

Advent calendars! Oh yes! What a good idea! Chocolate! It really has been that kind of day.     

Tuesday 10th December - Advent Book Club 10

Winter Rain                                                      Memories


Every valley drinks,                                       and suddenly the music from 
        Every dell and hollow:                           'Messiah' is filling my head, as
Where the kind rain sinks and sinks,            Isaiah is one of the other things
        Green of Spring will follow.                   I am reading in Advent

Yet a lapse of weeks                                     As I drive along the lanes to the
        Buds will burst their edges,                  various village schools I visit 
Strip their wool-coats, glue-coats, streaks,     I notice the hedges and trees.
        In the woods and hedges;                                                                                                                                                               
Weave a bower of love                                I look for the first leaves in the   
        For birds to meet each other,                hedges, the first daffodils and 
Weave a canopy above                                primroses. 
        Nest and egg and mother.                    I watch the rooks rebuilding 
                                                                                     their nests, sitting on their eggs
But for fattening rain                                    
        We should have no flowers,                   
Never a bud or leaf again                           And there's a particular chestnut 
        But for soaking showers;                    tree by the road that I look for 
                                                                     to see the leaves explode from  
Never a mated bird                                   the buds, and the candle-flowers
        In the rocking tree-tops,                       growing tall.    
Never indeed a flock or herd
        To graze upon the lea-crops.

Lambs so woolly white,                                                 
        Sheep the sun-bright leas on,                      
They could have no grass to bite                 Today was a grey and dank and
        But for rain in season.                            wet and cold. So I didn't do 
                                                                     any 'nature appreciation'.
We should find no moss                              I had my head tucked into my 
        In the shadiest places,                           collar and my eyes half-closed
Find no waving meadow-grass                     against the horrible weather.   
        Pied with broad-eyed daisies;               I wonder what I missed seeing?

But miles of barren sand,                           When I was a teenager, my
        With never a son or daughter,            parents lived in Indonesia.
Not a lily on the land,                                  I remember the long haul flights
        Or lily on the water.                             (we used to stop in Bahrain back
                                                                    then!) across hours and hours
We should find no moss                              of what seemed like an
        In the shadiest places,                        un-ending desert - brown,
Find no waving meadow-grass                   sandy, red, grey... no greens,
        Pied with broad-eyed daisies;             apparently feature-less; 
                                                                                            nothing but
But miles of barren sand,                                     miles of barren sand
        With never a son or daughter,
Not a lily on the land,
        Or lily on the water.